Dating Dance Patterns & Persuasion (can fill her love bucket!)

May 26th, 2010 Posted in Dating, Mating, Relating, Sherrie Rose Recommends, The Man Class Series

It is said that in the sales process if you mimic (in an understated way) your prospective client that it builds rapport and you get closer to the sale.  The same is true in when you are persuading and seducing a mate.

In the animal kingdom, firefly species use a special pattern of flashing to signal to potential mates.  This happens during mating season.  There’s another species of firefly that appears to be a remarkably successful seducer.  By copying the unique blinking pattern they attract other fireflies. However, this second species goal is not to mate, but to attack and eat them for dinner. 

How do you know if you are falling into love’s embrace or if you are an unsuspecting victim of persuasion?

In the dating dance when you mimic the other person by using exactly the same words phrases, you are generally more liked, but actually receive more green light signals from your prospective mate.  This strategy increases rapport and there is higher likelihood you will “get lucky,” get a phone number, or get a second date.

Following and repeating patterns of speech and movement is an effective persuasive tool.  It may increase a sense of closeness and understanding with another person. After giving someone your phone number, if they repeat it back to you in a way that’s different to how you remember it sounds it breaks rapport. Unexpectedly your phone number doesn’t sound right and you probably take a second (disapproving) look at that person.

When meeting people for the first time, you can develop good relationships in a quicker time by repeating back selectively the same words that they use. It does not matter if it is in dating, sales, business, or family functions.  Communication that follows patterns of words and phrases that are repeated creates closeness.
As a result, your date may be persuaded to go home with you or will be anxiously waiting for your next phone call or text message.

Read more about Persuasion by authors Steve Martin, Noah Goldstein and Robert Cialdini: 
Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to be Persuasive 
( New York Times bestseller)

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Sherrie Rose
The Love Linguist®
Dedicated to Enhancing Your Love and S*X Life!

Sherrie Rose Recommends:
Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to be Persuasive 

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