Adultery does not fill the love bucket
August 22nd, 2010 Posted in SEX, Sherrie Rose RecommendsThe Love Linguist goes to the Dictionary to share the story about ‘Why is it called “adultery” when being unfaithful isn’t a particularly “adult” thing to do?’
A celebrity marriage spotlight has raised some very grown-up questions about the words we use to talk about love, commitment and desire, and particularly adultery.
Gossip-mongers look for stories and are transfixed by the curious romantic situations of TV and movie star celebrities.
Where would “People” magazine or “US” be without celebrity gossip. These salacious scenarios are exactly what we need for an excuse to look at a dilemma of language that is as enigmatic as the state of celebrity marriage: the complexities of “adult” and “adultery.” How can such similar words have such different meanings?
Remarkably, the answer is that the words don’t share a common ancestor. “Adult” comes from the Latin verb adolescere, “to grow up, mature.” Students of Latin will understand what we mean when we say that adultus is the pluperfect of adolescere. Adultery, on the other hand, derives from a French word, avoutre, which in turn evolved from a distinct Latin verb, adulterare, “to corrupt.” The verb adulterate, “to debase or make impure by adding inferior materials or elements,” stems from the same source.
The sense of “adult” that means pornographic emerged as a kind of reverse assumption that adult and adultery have more direct links than they do.
Let’s look at the dictionary definition of adultery: “voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than his or her lawful spouse.” In fact, there are two types: single adultery (with an unmarried person) and double adultery (with a married person.) Here is the definition of adult: “having attained full size and strength; grown up; mature.”
What conclusions can we draw regarding relationships from these twists of etymology? Maybe that a real-life definition of adult is the condition of being responsible for our choices, and that the choice of whom to love and honor is probably the most adult decision of all.
Sherrie Rose Recommends: Go to dictionary.com for your etymology and linguistic reference checks!
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Sherrie Rose
The Love Linguist®
Dedicated to Enhancing Your Love and S*X Life!
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