This Valentine’s Day give love to another unconditionally – The simplest way to fill The Love Bucket.
We all want love and spend time searching for a lasting relationship. But, soon after we find it, many start running in the opposite direction. It always seems as if relationships are difficult; difficult to find, difficult to keep and enjoy.
The fundamental truth is, there is no inherent problem with relationships. “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ~Rumi
There is never a scarcity of relationships or love. Love is our natural condition, why aren’t we in it all the time? What keeps us from this love we are so hungry for?
In dating, the usual answer is that there are no good men or women around, or that there is something essentially wrong with me.
The truth is that we don’t know what love really is. We fall in love with a fantasy and when it starts to wear off and the real person peeks through, we recoil. Where has the love gone? We complain. That person hasn’t fulfilled our longings or dreams. We become so disappointed.
The answer is that the love hasn’t gone anywhere, because it wasn’t love from the start. We haven’t been in love with that person, we haven’t known them. We’ve fallen in love with a fantasy, dreaming of what that fantasy will do for us.
When the person before you appears and you know everything about them, and still love them, that is love.
A great teacher Virginia Lloyd, once put it beautifully, she said, "Love is wanting for the other what they want for themselves, even if you aren’t the one who is able to give it to them."
Love isn’t about getting your own needs and dreams met, it’s about opening your hand and giving. And as Rumi the poet said, ‘Open your hands if you want to be held.’ ~Rumi
Love is based in action. Pure-hearted giving, with no thought of what is coming in return is not only a wonderful gift to the other, it is the ultimate gift to yourself as well. Try and see.
“Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.” ~Rumi
By Dr Brenda Shoshana shared by Dr Harlan Kilstein
Let me lay some truth about "attracting" and "seducing" women.
All the techniques, pickup lines and tricks mean nothing if you’re incessantly unattractive.
And I’m NOT talking about looks here.
You can be an "average-looking" guy and still meet, attract, and arouse gorgeous women you meet in public places.
Heck, you can even be a little on the stocky side and still get laid… (though I still suggest you work your butt off to get in shape for the overflowing benefits you get during sex.)
However, if you’re in terrible shape, have an unpleasant personality or you still have yesterday’s Cheetos dust on your shirt, no amount of "psychological ninja dating tricks" can get a woman to consider going out with you, much less sleep with you.
"Attracting" women boils down to just being a fun and exciting guy. So when a woman sees you, she won’t think you’re creepy.
She’ll consider hanging out with you to see if you’re fun.
She’ll feel that she can surrender to your presence.
Here are some things that Sloane Fox of Personal Life Media would suggest to significantly scale up your "attractiveness level."
LIP-LICKING LUST-INDUCING ATTRACTION
#1 Get comfortable talking to women.
Think about it. You’re going to have to talk to her at some point. You might as well get used to having a woman right up in your face.
If all you have are pickup lines, you’re going to crash and burn.
Get yourself to a point where you’re so comfortable chatting and making small talk that you won’t need to think about it.
You can do this by simply approaching women over and over again with the sole purpose of FAILING.
Walk up to a woman and say something stupid on purpose and watch for her reaction. Then get up and brush her off. Rinse and repeat.
Try it. Start with lady friends so you’ll have less pressure. Then in time, work your way up to doing this with women you don’t know… then move up to the 8’s, 9’s and the 10’s.
I know it sounds weird and counter-intuitive, but it’s quite helpful in building up your confidence fast.
Fail on purpose so many times that the thought of failing doesn’t matter anymore. Whatever apprehension or fear of rejection that you might having inside will disintegrate.
This is the REAL secret dating coaches don’t want to tell you. I just saved you hundreds, maybe thousands of dollars worth of online dating courses.
#2 Look Good. Dress Well. And Have Good Hygiene.
This is pretty obvious, but I still have to say it.
Why? Because I still get emails from guys who still don’t have this down.
They email me asking for help, and when I reach out and dig deeper into their situation, I discover that some of them don’t even shower every day, and some don’t pay any attention to their personal grooming and hygiene.
Not all guys can pull off looking good with messy hair or a bushy beard.
Find a look that works for you and stick to it.
Men in general look unbelievably attractive with a clean-looking haircut and a nice shave. Don’t buy into the current trend of man-buns and beards if you come off looking like Santa Claus in the summer heat.
Big, hairy and sweaty. Uh-uh.
#3 Don’t Be Needy
This also ties in with tip # 1. The more you actually approach women, the more confident you will feel the next time you try it out.
Women notice confidence.
We can smell it in a man.
And this turns us on like crazy.
And if you have my first two tips down, you’ll have less need for approval and attention from a woman you’re trying to attract.
Being needy and always seeking a woman’s approval and attention turns us off in an instant. It annoys us. Always remember polarity.
That’s why when you do approach a woman, don’t try too hard. In fact, you can get away with more by not trying at all.
Here’s a way for guys to get women to chase them
Try this instead of the "old way" where guys like you always had to work hard and put in A LOT of effort into trying to impress us ladies.
(CLEAN VIDEO VERSION) Get Her To Make The First Move <=== Discover The Chase Triggers That Get Women Instantly Hooked On A Man
(DIRTY VIDEO VERSION) Do This And She’ll Chase After You For Sex <=== Drive Her Wild Enough To Lust After You
There are two versions of the video. Both of them talk about "Chase Triggers."
These triggers are powerful. Do not abuse them.
Get Her Chasing You!
1. Have a specific plan in mind. An event – No matter what it is, never say, "I don’t know….what do YOU want to do?". A man with no plan, is like an explorer with no map.
2. Drives to someone’s place to pick them up – Fewer than 50% of men actually will pick up a woman these days. Unless she lives 50 miles in the opposite direction. In that case, the classy woman will always offer to at least make it easier for you. But she still wants you to take her.
3. Bring a small gift or token – just something unexpected. With me, it’s often food. Don’t go crazy, and overwhelm her. I’m not a big fan of a dozen roses (that’s for established relationships), but I am a big fan of a single rose. Besides, a dozen roses makes a woman have to run back inside, or they’re going to sit in the car for 4 hours. Again, don’t overwhelm. Don’t smother.
4. Open a car door – There is a movie called "A Bronx Tale" that everyone should watch. If you’ve seen it, you know the scene about opening a car door. Although cars all have automatic locks these days, nothing is more appealing than opening a car door. Hell, opening ANY door.
5. Make introductions – It is almost impossible for many of us to go anywhere, and not run into at least one person we know. Introduce your date. Immediately. Don’t be shy about letting them know you’re on a date, and you’ll catch up later; no one wants to stand there for 10 minutes, having you pay more attention to the other person than her.
6. Keep phone use to a bare minimum – Everyone is guilty of selfies these days, but don’t take 50. Seriously. Don’t spend a bunch of time texting other people either, or being distracted. Be in the moment. Realize why you like each other, and why you’re sharing this moment together. This goes for men and women.
7. Send a quick text or call afterwards – Less than 50% of people follow up on a date. And that’s including the man AND the woman. If you had a good time, SAY something. If you thought he or she looked beautiful or handsome, SAY something. If you want to go out again, SAY something. This, again, goes for men and women.
Women want to be pursued, but so do men. Both like compliments, both like appreciation, and both like thoughtfulness. They don’t need to hear it for their ego….they need to hear it to know you’re interested! SAY something, or someone else will fill The Love Bucket!
Shared by Dave Bernstein
Filling The Love Bucket often begins with a conversation and sometimes there is negotiation.
Richard Mullender knows a bit about getting his way. He has the power of persuasion to talk someone out of jumping off a bridge or to prevent an armed kidnapper from killing the person they are holding captive.
Mullender gave a crash course in “life-or-death listening” at Advertising Week Europe in London on Monday and revealed the four most important words you need to use if you want to negotiate with someone.
Those words are: “I feel as if …”
“Don’t change the conversation. It’s the dumbest thing you can do. The secret is in the rambling.”
When you ask questions, you are changing the subject, rather than attempting to interpret how they feel. When people ask questions to let the other person “off the hook” and to stop them from rambling.
Instead of asking a direct question like: “Why are you doing that?” when attempting to interpret what someone is saying, you should say: “I feel as if … ”
Saying something like “I feel as if something I said upset you,” or “I get the impression this is the problem,” allows you to interpret their true emotion without offending them.
Mullender says: “It allows you to guess what you think the other person means. If you get it right, they expand on it. If you get it wrong, they correct you and expand on it.”
Mullender he runs his own training company, teaching companies about the power of listening. Mullender spent 30 years in the UK police force and then went on to spend five years as a hostage negotiator, working in Afghanistan and the Middle East.
Your Physical Stance
When sitting together, lean slightly forward, with open space between you and the person you are listening to. Keep your hands apart with your palms open. You should never sit directly opposite the person.
Leaning forward, not eyeball to eyeball. Instead of directly looking at each other eyeball to eyeball — which can feel quite intimidating and tense —slightly angle the chairs —to give people the opportunity to look away if they feel they need to.
The Art of Negotiation – All About Relationships!
Gary Noesner, Former Chief FBI Negotiator and author of "Stalling for Time," talks about relationships in The Art of Negotiation. In fact he says it is all about relationships. Communication skills are key. You also need the courage to compromise.
Want more? Join this sensual conversation, Listen or Download:
Sexuality Show Podcast Interview with Susan Bratton
• A special foot rub that wakes her up and makes her want sex.
• Erectile tissue you can stroke in her chest and neck that will enhance her arousal.
• The touch that says, "I have you safe, baby."
• The face stroke technique that turns a man into putty in your hands.
• The special way to get her to show her beautiful nude body to you.
• The optimal place to suck on her neck to make her squirm in pleasure.
• Lingerie that she loves and he finds sensational.
• A type of lady fat that he can’t keep his hands off.
• A squeezing, grabbing, cupping touch that won’t leave marks.
• How to give her a "stomach-gasm." Yes! It’s a THING.
Imagine what it would be like if you knew exactly how to turn your lover on along every level of sexual escalation as if you were just flipping a switch?
And when you DO flip the switch, they’ll be so hot for you in a matter of minutes… sometimes even just a few seconds…
That they just can’t wait to get started ravaging you… as you’re ravaging them… and giving each other immense amounts of sexual pleasure.
Well that’s exactly what’s going to happen after you listen to this recording.
Sexuality Show "10 Hot NEW Foreplay Techniques" <=== Listen or Download